Bad news, fans of Michael Bay or adenoidal, shiny films with no inherent plot or reason for being other than to mesh loud, repetitious noise with garishly epileptic editing, explosions, and actors who always look sweaty (ok, so this is still just directed at Michael Bay fans then)—the notoriously, well, awful director (awful in that his movies are the equivalent of about 50,000 empty calories, but gosh, they sure look shiny and neat, huh?) has said that his next film, now that Transformers: Dark of the Moon is done with, will be very, well, un-Michael Bay.
According to The AV Club:
“Michael Bay is plotting a return to the quiet, modest filmmaking roots that he long ago skipped over, telling MTV that his next film will be Pain And Gain, a project he’s been touting for a couple of years now as similar in sensibility to Pulp Fiction. The film is a dark comedy about bodybuilders who hatch an ill-fated kidnapping and extortion plot—and seeing as it’s based on real-life events chronicled in a 1999 Miami New Times article, there seems to be little room to transform Pain And Gain at the last minute into a more Bay-esque movie… Rather, Bay seems sincere about sticking to the material and the tone, and is even prepared to make Pain And Gain for the relatively low sum of $20 million.”
However, one gets the feeling that Bay will not be able to help himself from just mayyyyyyybe peppering the film with racially stereotyped robots, Shia LaBeouf overacting, and Martin Lawrence and Will Smith showing up to remind us when “shit just got real.” Oh, and then Nic Cage shows up to yell and shoot at something while Ben Affleck makes some jokes and then a hot girl does something and then some cars go vroom vroom real loud and some things explode and then some music plays and then the movie ends. Sounds fun, huh?
What do you think of the sound of Michael Bay’s next film?