Making a good stoner scene has to be one of the easiest things to accomplish in movies…
Writer: “Alright, so what if in this scene, character X smokes some weed, does something crazy, and hilarity ensues. Sound good?”
Director: “Alright, so this is the scene where your character is high. Just keep laughing and imagine your body is acting like it’s still in the womb, and hilarity will ensue. Sound good? Action!”
Actor: “Alright, let me get this straight. I’m an actor, and you want me to act like I have no idea what’s going on? God, I love this job.”
Making a list of the best stoner moments in movie history is like picking the best hockey fights in NHL history. Neither of them really matter in the grand scheme of things, but the world would be a lot less interesting without them. Here, in honor of Your Highness (which had a horrible opening weekend but we liked anyway) we present the definitive list of top stoner moments in cinema history…
10. Half Baked – Kenny Kills A Horse
I guess we might as well be a little responsible and showcase the occasional dangers of getting blitzed. What is the danger, you ask? Animals die. Horsies, to be exact. When the group sends Kenny out to load up in munchies, his weed-infected brain decides it’s a good idea to feed a police horse on his way back, and hilarious tragedy ensues.
9. Super Troopers – Kid Eats Many, Many Shrooms
The beginning of Super Troopers is every stoner’s worst nightmare—getting pulled over by the cops while in possession of enough shrooms to fill your pockets full. Interesting side note: the kid in the back seat that ate all those shrooms is the same guy who grew up and married Christina Hendricks. You are free to punch the wall now.
8. Blow – Guy Can’t Feel His Face
If you’re ever interested in the history of how cocaine was introduced to the U.S., be sure to hit up Blow. Here’s a scene that succinctly demonstrates the power of Colombia’s prime export as Depp discusses business with his partner and some dude lucky enough to be in the same room.
7. Friday – Smokey Ends Up In A Pigeon Coop
Friday is not only the Jackie Robinson of modern stoner films, but it also taught us all an important lesson. Just because getting stoned is potentially dangerous if you lace a joint with angel dust doesn’t mean it still can’t be funny, as demonstrated by a back-when-he-was-funny Chris Tucker.
6. Pineapple Express – Government Experimentation
If this scene is any indication about how the first marijuana experiments went, we feel that Uncle Sam really dropped the ball with all his misinformation scare tactics. Bill Hader damn sure made the most of only being in the movie for two minutes.
5. Bongwater – Jack Black Sings
Very underrated and awesome stoner scene featuring Jack Black singing a song campfire-style. We like to imagine this is what would go on if we had stoner camps instead of fat camps for kids – swaying along to acoustic ballads that make no sense, and nobody caring because they’re high.
4. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas – Hotel Reptiles
Perhaps none of the stoners on this list can hold a candle to Hunter S. Thompson left to his own device in Las Vegas. His trunk is packed with so many drugs, it’s hard to even remember what he’s on exactly when he starts tripping balls in the middle of his hotel. Pretty much 95% of this movie could’ve made the list, but this scene is the only 5% with walking, talking dinosaurs and lizards, so it gets the nod.
3. Harold and Kumar Go To White Castle – TV Ad
From the archives of arguably the best, funniest stoner film of the 2000s, a scene that encapsulates what every stoner must feel when he sees one of those kooky government ads about the mortal dangers of getting baked.
2. Up In Smoke – Cheech Smokes The Brock Lesnar Of Joints
Before Cheech and Chong showed up, stoners and stoner shenanigans were a thing of taboo. Thanks in part to possibly the biggest doobie in the history of cinema, that all changed. It’s probably a bad idea to take on a joint that size when you’re behind the wheel of a car, but whatever.
1. Reefer Madness – Marijuana Makes Kids Go Crazy
First on our list because Reefer Madness is first in the long, baked, awesome history of movies giving us stoned moments. Long story short, Reefer Madness was made to scare the general public back in the 1930s about the dangers of the evil weed. And for a time, it worked. Just look at those crazy kids!
Did we miss out on something that should’ve made the list instead of what we had? If you think we did (probably), be sure to let us know about it via the comments section below.