Can you say “Date Night”? Don’t get next to that fire; you’ll get burned. And then need a hypoallergenic cleansing cloth.

This photo has not, I repeat, has not been staged.

Strolling through Rock ‘n’ Roll Ralph’s on Sunset Blvd, I noticed a still life that demanded to be documented: A Teddy Bear (note the jutting foot), Summer’s Eve Cleansing Cloths and Taylor Lautner’s studly mug hawking Twilight: New Moon-brand Sweethearts Fire candy.

I’m gonna guess someone was getting all kinds of romantical in the dairy aisle and wanted to be prepared when they felt that “Intense Surge of Heat” Taylor, in full-on Fabio romance novel coverboy mode, promises. Either that, or a Twi-hard was getting ready for some serious Me Time but got distracted by Rob Patz on the cover of In Touch Weekly and left behind their Team Jacob fun pack.

Breaking Dawn feminine powder, anyone?