***Update: Thor Comic-Con Trailer Online Now – Watch It here.***

Today at Marvel’s Thor panel, they presented the audience with what is almost certainly going to be the full theatrical trailer.  Since we’re not allowed to show you the footage, it being exclusive to Comic-Con and all, I’d like to do my best to describe it to you. Check it out, after the jump…

Spoilers! Beware!

The trailer begins in an underground cell as Agent Coulson (Clark Gregg) interrogates an unseen suspect. “You made my men, some of the most highly trained professionals in the world look like a bunch of minimum wage mall cops.” As he says all this, there are flashes of soldiers being beaten, in the night rain. He continues, “It takes someone of similar training to do that to them. Why don’t you tell me where you learned to do that…Afghanistan? Pakistan? No, you strike me more as the soldier of fortune type. Who are you?” The suspect looks up, revealing a glaring Chris Hemsworth, as our hero, Thor.

We then find ourselves in outer space, traveling through the galaxy, until we end up in Odin’s hall, as he reprimands his son.  “I have sacrificed much to achieve peace, he says. So too must a new generation sacrifice to maintain that peace. Responsibility! Duty! Honor! These are not mere virtues to which we must aspire. They are essential to every soldier, to every king. Thor, Odin’s son, through your arrogance and stupidity, you have opened these peaceful realms and innocent lives to the horror and devastation of war. You are a vain, greedy, cruel boy.” Thor spits back, “You are an old man and a fool!” Odin replies, “Yes, I was a fool to think you were ready.”

Loki leans in to interject. “Father…”

“HEY!” Odin stops him. Back at Thor, he says “I now take from you your power. In the name of my father, and his father before him, I cast you out!” Thor screams and we travel through a wormhole, landing in the desert. “Oh no, this is Earth, isn’t it.” He says as he opens his eyes glaring up at Natalie Portman who finds him.

We are introduced to the film’s ladies, who are wary of him. He takes his shirt off and changes into normal clothes, and Kat Dennings says, “For a crazy homeless guy, he’s pretty cut.”

Over shots of Thor and Miss Portman, we hear him say, “Here you call it magic…when you can explain it you call it science.  Where I come from, they are one and the same.” She asks him, “Who are you?” He tells her, “The answers you seek shall be yours once I reclaim what’s mine.” We then see him struggling to lift his hammer, Mjolnir, out of the stone in which it’s embedded.

Back in Asgard, Odin is dying. Frigga (Rene Russo) stands over him and says, “The line of succession falls to you. Asgard is yours.” Loki, wearing his helmet, smiles wickedly.

Back on Earth, Thor says, “For the first time in my life, I don’t know what to do.” A woman’s voice says, “His fate is in his own hands now.”

After a pause, we see S.H.I.E.L.D. agents gathered in the desert, staring at a giant armored metal being: The Destroyer. “Is that one of Stark’s?”An agent asks. “I don’t know. That guy never tells me anything,” Coulson says. He addresses The Destroyer, “Hello. You are in possession of unauthorized weaponry. Please identify yourself.” The Destroyers face opens up to reveal nothing but fire. “Here we go,” Coulson says. The Destroyer then blasts all the cars, and as the battle begins, smash cut to the title logo.

END SPOILERS
THIS LOOKS AWESOME!  Thor comes out May 6, 2011.

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