A trio of heavy hitters roll on to DVD this week as Race to Witch Mountain, Obsessed, and The Soloist all make their way onto shelves.
TV on DVD comes up a bit light this week, but we do have what could be the worst DVD of the year so far!
Check out this weeks DVD and Blu-Ray releases…
This was it. The first film that The Rock finally made the full transition from his wrestling moniker to simply Dwayne Johnson.
So who’s next? Ludacris has put the Chris ‘Ludacris’ Bridges up on the marquee but hasn’t gone the whole way yet. Common and XZibit are sticking to their own names, as did RZA when he provided the funniest role in ‘Funny People’.
None seem ready to change anytime soon. So who will be next?
It’ll probably be P. Diddy. If and when he decides to act again, don’t be surprised to see a Sean Combs roll across the credits. He’s shed his need for his rotating nickname. Of course, having a slightly unusual name helps.
Oh yes, this is a DVD article. Race to Witch Mountain can be had as a two-disc extended edition.
This is a film category that is vastly under-utilized: The chick fight genre.
It’s something that appeals to both genders! Because most such fights are caused by romance, there’s always that sort of twisted love story to draw in the female audience, and a their boyfriends are much happier to go when they know two hot actresses are set to slug it out on set.
Picture this movie: Scarlett Johansson plays a young, innocent student who naively begins an affair with her professor. When his wife (played by Diane Lane) finds out, she starts tormenting the young student.
Eventually, Johansson’s character breaks out her shell and fights back – resulting in a massive chick brawl. That movie would rake in the cash.
In the meantime, you can just enjoy Beyonce and Ali Larter beating each other down when you buy the DVD.
There’s a lot of theories on why this movie bombed. Some think the adult drama is dead, and nothing can save them. Others think the film needed amazing reviews in order to succeed, and failed to receive them.
Here’s another theory. That trailer. They only ever made one. They made one trailer for this movie that seemed attached to every single film released. It was on kid’s movies and horror flicks. Art films and popcorn fare. Every single movie.
What’s worse? The movie got delayed 6 months. But they never got rid of the trailer. It ran for almost a year in front of every single movie.
So why does this result in box office failure? Because by the time the movie actually came out, everybody was already sick of it. They were fed up with a movie they hadn’t seen – therefore, they had no reason to actually see it.
If you managed to avoid the incessant trailer you can buy the DVD.
TV ON DVD
This seems like it should be a Horrible Straight-to-DVD Release, but this Lindsay Lohan vehicle actually debuted on ABC Family.
If anything, this is a bit of a good thing to see Lohan’s career plummet so drastically. It shows that when big stars misbehave there are repercussions. They simply can’t flit about the Santa Monica Police Department in high speed chases and gallavant in any way they choose and expect to remain relevant.
Of course, this is the station that bought us Jon Voight in “Karate Dog” so maybe her career’s actually on its way up.
- “Flight of the Conchords”: Season 2 – Buy Now
- “The Love Boat”: Seasons 1 & 2 – Buy Now
- “Project Runway”: Season 5 – Buy Now
Horrible Straight-To-DVD Release of the Week
There is no voting this week, because one movie stands out among all others. It is:
Val Kilmer makes it back-to-back trips to the HSTDROTW dungeon, and this one is a doozy. He plays an ex-college professor who traps some unwitting victims in a steam room and threatens to gradually increase the heat until they die. Why, you ask? Because he wants the local paper to publish his paper on Global Warming.
There are several problems with this premise. First of all, doesn’t everybody know about global warming already? Is one article really going to make much of a difference?
Second, what good is having an article published in a local paper going to do anyway? So maybe 20,000 people can glaze over the headline before they throw it away? Further contributing to global warming?
Finally, really, a steam room? Did we have to be that on the nose with our method of torture. Oh, I get it. It’s getting hotter in there. Just like the planet!
Wow, this is definitely worthy of some sort of Awful-DVD Hall of Fame Enshrinement.