Here are this weeks movie, TV, special edition and straight to DVD releases.
Starring: Mark Wahlberg
Remember when this movie came out? Yeah, didn’t think so. This movie was promoted heavily during the start of the NFL season and somehow almost beat The Dark Knight to DVD. So what was the problem? Well, it’s a video game movie – always a problem since they all suck. Secondly, it was based on a character that hasn’t been relevant for nearly a decade. It’s not like it was “Halo”.
Luckily for everybody involved in the film, Max Payne slipped into the bomb no-man’s-land where the movie tanked but not badly enough that anybody remembers it. The best example of this is Poseidon. Nobody anywhere even remembers that movie came out, because it just didn’t flop badly enough to become a spectacle. Also, for everybody who saw him playing Dick Cheney in W., Poseidon was the last time Richard Dreyfuss was in a movie. So that mystery is solved.
Starring: Tobin Bell
This franchise just keeps plugging away. And why not? The movie cast $10 million to make and made over $100,000,000 at the box office. So there is absolutely no stopping this juggernaut. So go ahead, buy the DVD, you can even buy the Unrated Director’s Cut, it’s not like poor sales will ever stop us from being subjected to the torture porn trailers year-after-year. And what a shame that is.
- City of Ember – Learn More – Buy Now
- Igor – Learn More – Buy Now
- Henry Poole Is Here – Learn More – Buy Now
- The Express – Learn More – Buy Now
- Repo! The Genetic Opera – Learn More – Buy Now
- The Children of the Huang Shi – Learn More – Buy Now
TV ON DVD
Chris Rock: Kill the Messenger
What is the greatest crime permeating late night television? It’s simple – Jimmy Fallon is about to have his own talk show while Chris Rock does not. There is not a person alive better-equipped to host a talk show than Rock. He’s smart, as funny as anybody, has experience chatting up guests (HBO’s “The Chris Rock Show”) and we know he’ll deliver well-written monologues with aplomb each night. Plus, he’ll bring a different attitude to the late-night airwaves. Still, NBC thought it better to hire somebody best-known for laughing his way through terrible “SNL” sketches. That’s just sad. In the meantime, you can enjoy Rock by buying another of his excellent HBO specials on DVD.
- “George Wallace” – Buy Now
- “Powerpuff Girls”: 10th Anniversary – Buy Now
- “Monster Quest”: Season 2 – Buy Now
- “Moonlight”: Season 1 – Buy Now
- “My Three Sons”: Season 1 – Buy Now
- “Emergency!”: Season 5 – Buy Now
- “Waking the Dead”: Season 3 – Buy Now
- “The Rockford Files”: Season 6 – Buy Now
- “Criss Angel: Mindfreak”: Season 4 – Buy Now
SPECIAL EDITION OF THE WEEK
It’s probably not hyperbole to call The Notebook the ultimate chick flick. Is it? Are there women who don’t like this movie? This is almost the “Sex and the City” of movies – even more so than the Sex and the City movie! Why? Because no guys like it. They all dread a moment in a relationship where their new girlfriend whips out her nearly worn-out copy of The Notebook for a night in.
At least now, those nights can be enjoyed with a pristine copy of the film contained in this limited edition gift set that comes complete with a scrapbook!
- Ghost: Special Collector’s Edition – Buy Now
- Children of a Lesser God – Buy Now
- Magnificent Obsession: Criterion Collection – Buy Now
- El Norte: Criterion Collection – Buy Now
- The Who: The Kids are Alright: Deluxe Edition – Buy Now
HORRIBLE STRAIGHT TO DVD RELEASE OF THE WEEK
This Is Not A Test
Starring Hill Harper, who is apparently on “CSI”, this film is the madcap and screwball dramedy that shows how a man’s obsession with the threat of a nuclear strike (very 1960s, no?) ruins his life and marriage. Hilarity ensues when the main character starts to build a bomb shelter and everyone thinks he’s crazy. Everyone, that is, except his new neighbor Tom Arnold, who is playing himself. See – told ya this was HSTDROTW worthy.